When you need someone the most ....
When you face problems through your life,when you wish that there's really someone there to talk about,
when you really feel down needing support,
when you feel like giving up ....
In return friends are the who's telling me not to give up, telling me how should I go about, telling me that they would come n ask me out for lunch, telling me that they'll keep me in prayers ....
The one who always told me that he'll me there no matter what, the one who said he'll be my listener all time and tolerate me with whatever that's gonna come, but everything turn the opposite way, in the end what I got was scoldings telling me that I'm being too much, complaining over the job and so on, even I cried out tears that's enough to fill a damn river, he does not have a single feeling for me at all. He just said damn it's your fault for everything, making the situation like this, not even trying to understand what I'm going through .. is this call love?
Love need alot of patient and tolerance, I've given that part everytime he needed me the most, I send numerous msg, I do everything I could to give him the comfort, but now at this point when I needed someone the most, things doesn't goes the other way round, every single blame is place on me, even talking to me in one kind of attitude that really pissed me off until I shouted. Well, if the blame is on me I had nothing to say, I'm in the verge of giving up .. in everything ..
No matter whether I apologise on that matter that I shouted, no he's not forgiving but instead continue scolding and putting the blame on me. This had really made me think that he's not the one that I can spend a life time with or the one I would want to get married in the future. If even such little tolerance he can't give to me. How if next time if we are to have a family, and even small things like this can't pass?
I'm frustrated enough with many many things around me, yet people I need the most is so discouraging. I've done nothing serious until you need to make me feel as bad as how I feel now.
Someone always tell me that there must be a guy who will treat me very well in future will appear, she said I deserve more than that, because what I've given out all these years to a guy, eventually one day I will find someone who's willing to do the same to me in future. You know, I really wish whatever you say will come true ....
What's the whole point of folding a star when you know you're waiting for an empty hope ?
I'm really mad tonight.... adv_username = "suzannetan"; adv_gid = "suzannetan_default"; adtype = "180x150";
Author **Suzanne** @ 12:52 AM
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